As this is a brand new site, a lot of stuff isn't up yet. The Services, Contact Us, Testimonials, and other good stuff that most web sites have will be coming soon. Your patience is appreciated.
August 3, 2009
This site is about helping women resist abortion pressure when they DON"T want an abortion. Often the word choice is used as a public relations ploy. But in dealing with a real, live, flesh and blood pregnant woman, who has an unplanned pregnancy, many people conveniently forget that choice implies more than one option.
The assumption that abortion is the only choice comes through loud and clear. Some will even say things like, "You really don't have much of a choice here." NO choice. What an irony. On the streets, on the TV, in print, and in press conferences, they say it's all about choice. But for the individual woman in the privacy of a clinic, or a home, or wherever it's discussed, she's told she has no choice.
This site is called My True Choice, because it's for women who want to exercise their true choice and give birth to a live baby. It's for women who want to control their own bodies--all the way to live childbirth. In other words, their true choice is to skip the abortion and have a live baby.
Many so-called "pro-choicers" will claim that those trying to help women avoid abortions will deceive them. They claim the pro-lifers trick women out of having abortions they really want to have. They claim the pro-lifers will pretend to help women look at all the options, then steer them away from abortion, impeding and slowing women down in their quest to have an abortion.
Let's get something straight right now. This is NOT a site to help you find or access an abortion. It's a site for women who are looking for alternatives to abortion. So if you really have your heart set on getting an abortion, this is not the site for you. Look elsewhere! Now that this is clearly stated, nobody can say that I deceived them or interfered with their choice. (Not that I wouldn't want to convince you to give life to your unborn child. Hopefully you will change your mind before it's too late, and let him or her live.)
However, if you find yourself with an unplanned pregnancy, have pro-life feelings that others in your life don't share, have a friend in this situation, or are just curious for future knowledge, this is the site for you. If you, or a friend are facing an unplanned pregnancy, you may feel alone and scared. In this state of mind, you might be vulnerable to pressure to do something you don't want to do. It may be easy for someone to convince you that there are no other options. But there are other options. You just need to plug into the right help.
Avoiding forced or coerced abortion is important for women. One of the pro-choice movement's dirty little secrets is that more than 60% of women who have abortions feel the decision was not their own. A woman facing an unplanned pregnancy is often pressured to have an abortion by other people in her life. These people are usually afraid of the changes that her baby will bring to their lives. Husbands and boyfriends who don't want to be fathers, mothers who don't want to be grandmothers, friends who don't want to lose a drinking partner, population control zealots, and roommates who worry a crying baby will disturb their sleep at night; these may all have their own reasons for pressuring a woman into an abortion. In addition, teachers, guidance counselors, doctors, employers, nosy landladies, and homeless shelter staff may all use their power to pressure a pregnant woman into an unwanted abortion.
They may be deceived into thinking that they're helping the woman or girl. But they're controlling her in an extremely oppressive way. The abortion industry will deny it, but pressuring a woman into an abortion sets her up for physical and psychological complications.
Another of the pro-choice movement's dirty little secrets is that the leading cause of death among pregnant women is murder. The American Medical Association has noticed it, as the following quote shows.
Pregnant and recently pregnant women are more likely to be victims of homicide than to die of any other cause. (Frye, V. Examining Homicide's Contribution to Pregnancy-Associated Deaths. The Journal of the American Medical Association, 285, No. 11, March 21, 2001)
It used to be that pregnancy had a protective effect on women, statistically decreasing their chance of death. No more. The increasing murder rates of pregnant women now makes pregnancy a more dangerous time. The killings are usually a retaliation for the woman's refusal to have an abortion. It's usually done by a husband or boyfriend who doesn't want to be a father. Sometimes it's other people who have a problem with her being pregnant. The choice to have an abortion has morphed into the duty to have an abortion in some people's minds. For some, the refusal to abort is considered a capital offense. So much for a woman's right to choose.
Yet many so-called pro-choice lobbying groups campaign against special laws to protect women from violence during pregnancy. They campaign against special protections for pregnant women in general. They campaign against laws that would punish someone for killing a wanted fetus. They campaign against Unborn Victims of Violence Acts. They do very little for women who face violence for refusing to abort. They want no extra penalty for killing a pregnant woman, over and above what would be given for killing any woman. In fact, they don't seem to care about helping women choose life at all.
Compare this with the outraged response when a woman wants an abortion, and is inconvenienced by a 24 hour waiting period. They scream like banshees when a woman is irritated and annoyed by the information she receives at a Crisis Pregnancy Center. If women are murdered in large numbers all across the country (even the FBI has noticed the phenomenon) for refusing to abort, their silence on the topic is deafening. But God forbid that any woman be inconvenienced, irritated, or annoyed. That is more than any one woman should have to put up with.
This is a clue that if you're pregnant, do NOT want an abortion, and need help, you should be cautious about sharing your situation with "pro-choice" people. If you know a pro-choicer personally, and know you can trust that individual, OK. But don't reach out blindly to pro-choicers you don't know (or maybe not ones you do know either). If you must reach out to strangers, pro-lifers are a better gamble, at least if you want to avoid abortion. At least they will be on the same page as you on the abortion issue.
If you want to avoid an abortion, or even if you're just not sure, do NOT go to Planned Parenthood or any abortion clinic "to discuss all the options." The abortion industry is in the business of selling abortions, and it IS a business with them. The more abortions they do, the more money they make, just like any other business. Many of the so-called "counselors" in the average abortion clinic are counselors in name only. It would be more honest to call them sales people. That's really their job, not to counsel the women, but to sell them abortions. Some of them even get paid by commission, according to how many abortions they sell. If you walk out of the clinic, still pregnant, they lose money.
How do most abortion clinics deal with the issue of forced or coerced abortions? First, it's important to understand that abortion clinic staff come in a variety of ethical levels. I know that sounds odd, since they're in the business of killing babies. But many of them are deceived into thinking it's not a baby. So the fact that they're in the baby killing business isn't a good indicator of how well meaning they are. They're often further deceived onto thinking they're helping the women they're doing abortions on. (They're actually harming them, but they think they're helping.) They truly believe in a woman's right to choose and wouldn't knowingly do abortions on women who don't want them. That's one end of the ethical spectrum.
Then there's the opposite end of the ethical spectrum; the ones who do NOT care. They may know full well that they're killing babies, but that doesn't bother them. (Although they would never admit they're killing babies in public, not good PR, you know.) They don't care about the women either. These sharks are in the business for one thing and one thing only; the money. For them, the money from a forced or coerced abortion is just as green as the money from a woman who desperately wants the abortion. That's all they care about.
The clinic is your last line of defense. Once you're in there, it's you and your baby's last chance to escape. DO NOT go to the abortion clinic unless you are taken there by force.
For more information on this situation, one of the other web sites on forced and coerced abortion is called Abortion Concern. It seems to be a web site from New Zealand, but much of the advice is good in the U. S. and Canada too. The address is www.abortionconcern.org, so check them out. There are side bars on both the left and right side of the Abortion Concern web site. On the left side bar, second item down is a box the says "Facing Abortion Pressure." Click it and a list of small articles comes up, about why abortion pressure will harm you, and what can be done to resist it. The third article down is titled, "Protection Against Abortion Pressure: Legal Protection and Other Options" (www.abortionconcern.org/pregnant-help/legal-protection.php.
In the last paragraph of this article, it recommends the following for women who are taken to an abortion clinic by force.
Be sure the staff knows you are there against your will.
Ask them to call the police.
DO NOT sign anything at the clinic. Instead of signing your name to the forms they give you, write HELP ME, or CALL POLICE in the space provided.
If you're lucky, it's a clinic where there are real ethics, and where they really do believe in choice. Then when you tell the staff that you're there against your will, they will refuse to do the abortion on you. If you end up in a place that's not so caring or honorable, where the word choice is nothing but a cheap PR ploy, they'll have four or five staff people hold you down, and/or inject you with a drug to knock you out, and thereby stop your resistance. In the meantime, they'll tell you to be quiet, and not scream, yell, or cry, lest the noise upsets other patients in the waiting room. (Again, not good PR, you know. It might hurt their precious sales figures.)
It might be time to threaten a lawsuit. (See the August 6, 2009 entry below.
A good book about avoiding forced and coerced abortion!
There is a book about avoiding abortion, called, 'Having Your Baby When Others Say No,' by Madeline Pecora Nugent.
This book may be out of print, as it is difficult to find in libraries or bookstores. However, it is available as an e-book. The address is www.thombs.com/woman2woman/table.html
Give this web site and this e-book a try. It has valuable information in it about concealing your pregnancy (and why you should), how to find the right confidant, taking care of yourself when pregnant, where to turn for help, why you should avoid Planned Parenthood and other so-called pro-choice places when you want to avoid an abortion, plus lots of other tips. It has tips for teenagers, career women, and older women. It even has a section on women who are pregnant in prison, and how to get the prenatal care you need from an unsympathetic prison staff.
The Appendices are a wealth of information too, everything from prenatal development to agencies that can help you, to parenting choices to lifestyle options.
All in all a good read for anyone who is pregnant, or anyone who cares for someone who is pregnant.
August 6, 2009
Nobody can legally force you to have an abortion.
But what if you are taken to an abortion clinic by force? Suppose the staff doesn't care if you tell them you're there against your will? Meanwhile, the person forcing you signs the consent forms, because you won't. If you try to run away, the staff might even chase you, drag you back to the clinic, restrain you in some way, and prepare for the procedure, despite your objections. These things only happen in a clinic where ethics are non-existent.
If this happens to you, threaten to sue the clinic. If you're too young to sue, remind them that you won't be this young forever.
Tell them that as soon as you are old enough, you will sue them.
It may seem an eternity to you before you will be that old. But it won't seem like such a long time to them. Older people see the years between fifteen and eighteen as a very short time, and this threat will seem like it's very close at hand.
Ethical clinics never knowingly go along with coerced or forced abortions. But if you're in a clinic that only cares about money, you'll have to threaten their pocketbook to save your baby.
Are you of African-American descent?
Are you facing an unplanned or crisis pregnancy?
Are you thinking of getting an abortion?
If you answerd "Yes" to all three of the above questions, check out the following web site before you get that abortion. It might open your eyes to some things.
Resources to Help You And Your Baby
open 8:30 am to 5 pm EST
Care Net and Heartbeat International both support the phone number
1-800-395-HELP (4357) and the web site www.optionline.org
National Life Center
They answered the phone, even though I called after 10 pm Pacific Time (that means it was after 1 am Eastern Time). On their web site, I found out they are open 24 hours a day, every day. The woman who answered the phone was pleasant and eager to help. They offer callers referrals for all types of support that a pregnant woman might need in her local area, including job referrals, housing, clothing, help fleeing domestic violence situations, etc. You name it, if a pregnant woman needs it, they will help you find it.
Another helpful web site is
It has a place where you can fill in your location anywhere in the U.S. or Canada and they will give you a list of Pregnancy Help Centers in your area. You can also check a list of needed services to help them narrow the search.